Dear Laine,

My 27 year old boyfriend never worked a real job in his life and is lying to me about looking for a job.

He has a Bachelor's degree in economics. Would anyone hire him at his age without any previous experience? I really want him to have a job before our wedding next month. How can I help him find one?

Anxious GF

Dear Anxious,

He is lying to you about looking for a job and you want to know if a company would hire him with no experience?? Do you see the quantum leap over a very important detail there?? WHY would you want to be with someone who lies to you about something like that? My gramma always said 'if he'll lie about one thing, he'll lie about everything!" And "you can lock up from a thief, but you can't lock up from a liar, so avoid those!"

If you know he is lying, he is not only LAZY but dishonest. If he does manage to get a job (never know, one might just land in his lap while he's playing xbox) I would doubt he would be able to keep it for long.

Be really REALLY sure before you invest too much on this one. Sounds like a loser to me. If you don't believe me, ask your mom or any older female relative. If they tell you to hook your wagon to that pony I'll give up chocolate for a month!!

Not worried about my chocolate,

Laine

To Tell or Not to Tell..That Is the Question

Dear Laine,

My husband and I went out to dinner the other night and saw my best friend's husband eating dinner with another woman. At first we thought it might be completely innocent--a business dinner or something. It did not appear to be anything else while they were in the restaurant, but when we were leaving we passed by my friend's car and saw her husband and this woman kissing quite passionately in the front seat.

I think I should tell my friend what I saw. My husband says I should stay out of it because it is not our business and telling her may only ruin our friendship. The husbands are not friends, so I think he just doesn't realize how devastating it is to keep this kind of secret from my friend.

If I tell her, it will hurt her. If I don't tell her and she finds out I knew, it will hurt her. What would you do in my place?

Concerned Busy Body

Dear Concerned,

You have already lost the opportunity to do what I would have done because I would have been knocking on the window of that car, letting him know I'd seen him. Then I'd give him 24 hours to either tell his wife or answer her questions when I told her.

I do see your husband's point, though. You know how that saying, "Don't shoot the messenger" came about, don't you? There is a chance your friend will believe her husband would never do such a thing and blame you for trying to ruin her marriage with lies. There is also a chance your friend already knows or at least suspects there is a third wheel in her marriage.

If this woman is a dear friend, then do what your heart says is the right thing. You could always watch "A Letter to Three Wives" together and see if she'd want to know if her husband was having an affair before you make up your mind.

Just know that no matter which way you decide, your friend is going to be hurt. But if you let her know you are there for her, maybe the hurt won't be long lasting.

I wish you luck. Please know you are in my thoughts and your friend is in my prayers.

Decidedly,

Laine